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Open A BoxEst. Quite RecentlyEnrol · £5

Admissions now open · Michaelmas, Lent & whenever

Some qualifications take years to earn. This one costs a fiver.

The Certified Idiot certificate: a gloriously official-looking, personalised PDF for the person in your life who has earned it. Possibly you.

Personalise yours · £5How it works

A novelty gift. Not a real qualification. Please don't put it on your CV.

· NESCIO QUID FACIO ·THE MOST HONOURABLE ACADEMY OF OPEN A BOX— Faculty of Questionable Decisions —Be it known to all persons thatYour Brother-in-Lawhaving demonstrated conspicuous, sustained and frankly admirable foolishness,is hereby admitted to the distinguished rank ofCERTIFIED IDIOTwith all the rights, privileges and blank stares pertaining thereto.(A novelty certificate. Confers no academic, professional or legal status whatsoever.)Prof. I. M. DimmDean of Dunces6th day of November, 2026Date of ConferralCertificate No. MB-0001-IDOTCI
  • Accredited by absolutely no one
  • No entry requirements
  • Graduates in under a minute
  • Printable A4 landscape PDF

The Graduation Process

Four steps to distinction

  1. I

    Nominate a candidate

    Enter the name of the deserving individual — yourself, a sibling, a colleague who replied-all.

  2. II

    Pay the tuition

    A single, all-inclusive fee of £5. Considerably less than student loans.

  3. III

    Receive your PDF

    Download instantly and get a copy by email. Personalised, numbered and ready to print.

  4. IV

    Present with ceremony

    Print, frame, and hand over with a solemn nod. Gowns optional. Applause mandatory.

Admissions Office

Confer the honour

Type a name and watch the Academy's finest calligraphers (a computer) get to work.

· NESCIO QUID FACIO ·THE MOST HONOURABLE ACADEMY OF OPEN A BOX— Faculty of Questionable Decisions —Be it known to all persons thatYour Name Herehaving demonstrated conspicuous, sustained and frankly admirable foolishness,is hereby admitted to the distinguished rank ofCERTIFIED IDIOTwith all the rights, privileges and blank stares pertaining thereto.(A novelty certificate. Confers no academic, professional or legal status whatsoever.)Prof. I. M. DimmDean of Dunces6th day of November, 2026Date of ConferralCertificate No. MB-XXXX-XXXXCI

Live preview · Your PDF is A4 landscape, print-ready, and has a unique certificate number. Download a free watermarked specimen

Who is being honoured?
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Exactly as it should appear. Please check the spelling.

We'll send the PDF and your receipt here. No marketing, ever.

Certified Idiot Certificate (PDF)
£5.00
Total
£5.00

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The small print, in large print

It's a joke. A very handsome joke.

The Most Honourable Academy of Open A Box does not exist, has never existed, and will not be holding a graduation ball. Our certificates are novelty gifts with no academic, professional or legal value — but they do look tremendous in a frame.

Frequently Asked Questions

Enquiries from prospective idiots

All questions